Keeping In Touch Post-Graduation

Dear Bonded,

I recently graduated from college in a large city, packed up my life’s belongings, and moved back to my small home town. While some of my friends are sticking around our alma mater city for work, most have also moved back home to save money, look for jobs, or transition to graduate school. All this is to say that it probably won’t be possible for us to easily “get together” again without lots of advance planning and plane tickets. While I realize it’s partially inevitably, I hate the thought of drifting apart from these wonderful women. We’ve spent some major, formative years together, and shared so many memories. What are some ways I can stay in touch with my collegiate friends until we can swing those plane tickets?

New Life, Old Friends

Dear New Life, Old Friends:

First off, congratulations. Collegiate graduation is something to celebrate! It’s also, as I remember, an overwhelming and uncertain time. Transitioning into the working world often means: moving, leaving the familiar environment of campus, job searching, paying bills, interviewing, and a whole slew of other stressful (but necessary) things. Leaving behind a support system of friends is often overlooked in the equation. While this happens for many, if not most, graduating seniors, the experience is still isolating.

As two friends in a long-distance friendship for the last five years, we have some experience in this area. Here are a few ways to keep your friendships alive and well, despite being many miles apart.

1. Standing Facetime Date. Set up regular Facetime dates with your friends. Or, go old school and call them on the phone. These dates don’t have to be long or every day -- just keep them regular. In fact, sometimes the short calls are the easiest to fit in when you’re busy. Often, they can be the most meaningful, just knowing you have someone you can call without any expectations as to a time commitment. Carving out space and time for each other regularly will help keep each of you relevant in each other’s lives.

2. Snapchat on the Reg. Snapchat is perfect for long-distance friendships, because it allows you to send pictures of yourself or your daily happenings to friends without them needing to be immediately available for conversation. The filters make it extra fun. They’ll feel like they’re at happy hour with you at 5 pm PST, despite being already in bed on the East Coast! If Snapchat’s not for you, check out Marco Polo.

3. Start a Group Text. Keep an ongoing group text with your friends to share your day-to-day hilarities, frustrations, and of course, gifs. Sometimes group texts are a double-edged sword, like when you walk away for fifteen minutes and return to two-hundred missed texts. Be ready to ask your friends for the Cliff Notes of what you missed, rather than getting bogged down.

4. Plan to Visit Your Friends, If You Can. Money permitting, plan to visit your friends in their respective cities. It’s a great way to visit new places on the cheap, and your friends will love nothing more than to show you around their stomping grounds.

5. Plan a Reunion Trip. Again, money permitting, organize a trip with all your friends to reconnect after everyone’s settled in their various cities. It’ll give everyone something to look forward to and doesn’t need to be expensive. Rent a cabin in the mountains, or head to the beach in the off season. Split between a group of people, these trips can be super affordable. Pro tip: put someone in charge otherwise the planning process will be total chaos.

6. Send Your Pals A Little Something. Remember the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants series? A group of long-distance friends (basically) mailed a pair of magical jeans back and forth to each other while having adventures in said jeans. The takeaway is less about the jeans and more about how they stayed in each other’s lives through this seemingly unimportant object that connected them. Little gifts keep you on someone’s mind and shows them you care. The gift doesn’t need to be big -- maybe a snack from the city you live or a souvenir from a place you visited. A letter or card would be just as good as a gift, too!

7. Share an Activity. Participating in something that’s relevant to the both of you (or the group of you), despite living in separate towns, will serve as an amazing cohesive. Not only will it give you something to talk about, it will help you remain relevant in your ever-changing lives. Try starting a monthly book club (check out ours!). Facetime during your favorite TV show, like the Bachelor or Housewives. Or, listen to a podcast that comes out weekly, so you all can discuss.

Best of luck to you and your friends.

Love,

The Bonded Editors

---

Brittany Kilpatrick is an attorney and co-founder of Bonded Magazine. She likes carbs, reading, pondering the intricacies of Donald Trump's spray tan, Beyoncé, Thesaurus.com, musicals, fully replacing her daily water intake with La Croix, and her dog, Tucker.

You can find her on Facebook or Instagram: @brittany.kilpatrick or on Bonded social media: @bondedmag. Email here here: brittany@bondedmagazine.com.