Mariah Carey Is The Queen Of My Heart and Also Christmas

Not feeling as festive this holiday season? Me either. Between the election, Aleppo, Donald Trump’s tweets, and that disgusting picture of a mere semblance of a martini from Trump Grille, 2016 hasn’t been the best year. Memorable? Certainly. Enjoyable? Not so much. Back in more blissful times before November 8th, I remember telling my best friend how I planned on really getting into the Christmas spirit this year. And while I did construct a Christmas tree made out of coat-hangers, tinsel, and string lights, staying in the holiday spirit has been a little harder than I anticipated.

But rather than bore you an exposé of my feelings surrounding this year’s holiday season, I’ve opted to distract you instead. Sometimes, wallowing can be exhausting, and it's in those moments that I look for a distraction. And who better to distract you with than Mariah Carey, America's most beloved Queen of Christmas. It was no accident that she aired the first episode of her eight part “docuseries” just after Thanksgiving -- the official start, for many, of the Christmas season. Mariah Carey owns Christmas.

While there are endless Mariah Carey Christmas moments to pick from, these are a few of my favorite, where she shows us that she's still, without a doubt, the reigning Queen of Christmas.

#1 Just last week, Mariah released her first MAC cosmetics collection, just in time for the holidays!

It's as glitzy, glittery, and glamourous as Mariah, herself, and only Mariah Carey, the Queen of Christmas, could be the poster-girl of MAC cosmetics at their busiest time of the year. They know what she represents: Christmas embodied. Check out the full collection here.

#2 Everyone knows that Mariah's "All I Want For Christmas" is the best Christmas song OF ALL TIME.

And also the most successful Christmas song of all time. This song arguably carried the entire, tremendously terrible plot of Love Actually.

#3 Last year, Mariah had TWO CHRISTMASES. One in December and one in January.

Celebrating two Christmases meant she needed another tree just for the January celebration. You didn't know? Mariah is also the Queen of Extra.

#4 Mariah's "Pink Room" at Christmas is the fantasy of girly-girls everywhere.

Three years ago, the Queen welcomed Tamron Hall from the Today Show into her immaculate home at Christmastime. What we learned was nothing short of fascinating. Every year, Mariah spares no expense in decorating her entire home for Christmas. Her favorite room of all, we learn, is the Pink Room. The Pink Room at Christmas has multiple green trees, decorated with live pink peonies, white icicles, and white and pink ornaments. It matches the satiny, lush, pink room that holds all Mariah’s family keepsakes. And no kids allowed -- this room is just for the Queen, herself.

Take a tour of the Pink Room room here.

#5 And anytime Mariah Carey graces HSN with her presence, we're here for it, but especially at Christmas.

Mariah Carey is a staple on the Home Shopping Network (HSN), but at Christmas, she really turns it up. There's more glitter, more seasonally appropriate gifts, more "darlings," and more ingenious spur-of-the-moment one-liners in true, unfiltered Mariah form.

Like the time Mariah hawked some pretty run-of-the-mill, prepackaged Christmas tree ornaments, but gave it her Mariah flare and totally sold us the seemingly ordinary "onion" ornament.

"I mean, they call them the onion-shaped ones, but I"m not sure I wanna, like, think about the ornament as an onion?"

This was also the moment she gave her haters a big Mariah middle finger, when the co-host asked her why she hasn't written a Christmas cookbook, if she's, indeed, that great of a cook. Mariah's perfect response: “I don’t think they realize the depths of my cooking capabilities. These people. I don’t know who they are. But they don’t get it.”

Same day. Different product. This, time, "Glitzy Santa."

Briefly, we all thought we needed it. Mariah's description of Glitzy Santa and his lifestyle was spot on, and what really sold me, in that moment.

“This Santa is like Santa when he goes to the festival for whatever. Where do they go? Like, North Pole moments. You know, like when he goes to the outings.”

This year, all I really want for christmas is you, Mariah.